East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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