i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
