i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
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