How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
