The maid of honor just puked.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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