What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize