i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
