OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
