You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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