He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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