HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
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