My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
