My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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