The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize