I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
You took a bar mat shot.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize