So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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