i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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