went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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