4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
