Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Where are you guys?
Drunk
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize