Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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