This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
