i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
These tits shall not be calmed
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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