her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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