am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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