The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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