It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
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He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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