My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
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hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
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After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
and you fell through a lawn chair