we have officially lost it.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
