Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize