The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I will be naked everywhere
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
