that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Randomize