He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
