you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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