i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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