Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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