I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize
