Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Randomize
