my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Randomize
