Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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