ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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