its not stalking. its research.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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