what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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