So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
