Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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