You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
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I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
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Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to