So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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