i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
it's like iHOP with fire
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
