You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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