Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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