The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
